Monday, March 12, 2018

The Hamiltons (2006)

I really liked the premise of this story. It was a sort of cross between the vampire movie Near Dark and the television drama Party of Five. Hey, your chocolate got into my peanut butter...

The Hamilton household consists of four siblings who lost both their parents in a never-really-explained accident who are trying to make it as a normal family on their own. Of course, they are also the type of people whose main source of sustenance is human blood, so it’s not as easy as one might think to maintain appearances.

The bulk of the story is told from the point-of-view of Francis (Cory Knauf), the teenage boy of the house who not only has to worry about his school grades and family secrets, but also the frequent visits from the friendly social worker. It’s a beautiful coming-of-age story as our young hero begins to develop a bond with one of the freshly-stocked pantry items in the basement.

Although the characters try to be deep and diverse, Darlene (Mackenzie Firgens), the lone female of the clan really brings the whole family down by way of giving the appearance of a typical All-American family. While we can chuckle at the clean-cut eldest who has assumed the role of family leader, takes on all the responsibilities, and has the occasional guilty pleasure of a man in his bed; and we can forgive the middle brother who has that charming “bad boy” attitude that no horror film blood-drinking family seems to be able to do without, the girl needs a serious character makeover. After all, nothing screams “Nope, no vampires here” like a pale woman with black hair, gussied up with black lipstick and heavy eyeliner, clad in outfits that are all the rage in certain Goth clubs.

But if you can excuse Little Miss Death On Heels, the story is actually very enjoyable and even endearing.

Film information: The Hamiltons

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