Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Train (2008)

Train is the story of Alex, a young woman who is part of a USA wrestling team that is competing in Europe along with her boyfriend and a few of their closest friends. Of course, they just can't stay in their hotel when there is so much partying to be had. It's too bad they missed their train... but lucky for them that a nice lady pointed out a smaller train that is going exactly where they need to be.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present Turistas on wheels.

This film seems to be very inspired by the popular torture porn films. Even the opening credits involve more blood and body parts than your average Friday the 13th flick.

The basic idea is that this particular rouge train is actually the most unsanitary organ transplant clinic in the world, and the operators use every tourist they can get their hands on for the donors. Of course, we all know that it's best if the donor is kept alive as long as possible before harvesting organs (even better if the needed parts are non-vital). Also, this group of European doctors don't seem to believe in anesthetics... at least not for the folks who didn't pay a great deal of money to board the train.

It's a ninety minute bloodbath with minimal distractions by way of a plot or subtext.

At least it's not a watery bloodbath. The gore is juicy and the, I mean organ harvesting... is worthy of a few cringes despite being utterly unbelievable.

Is it actually a good movie? No.
Is it just a fun bone for the gorehounds? Definitely.

Film information: Train


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